Jokes Jokes Jokes

by Gift Shop

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madisonn_rrose Saw Gift Shop at the Middle East in Boston a few weeks ago and was blown away. Killer bass player, killer style, killer tunes!! Favorite track: At Owl.
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released December 28, 2016

drums tracked by Chris LaRocque & Steve Aliperta
@ Kennedy Studios
everything else tracked by Josh & Billy @ Fran's
mixed by Josh & Billy
mastered by Chris



all rights reserved


Gift Shop Boston, Massachusetts

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Track Name: Inhaler
hearing jokes, hearing fake japanese
in the bathroom line
she says, “I need a break from my break”
I check the time

left hand scissors making cracks in the coffee table
you ask for a light
while I pick dog hairs off my jeans
and try to act polite

then she asks if he found god
and he says, “I guess”
then he asks, “you come here a lot?”
and she turns the other way

making friends in the parking lot
with some kind of writer
says he’s working on a book about a taxidermist
who kills his wife

then I ask who he reads
he says, “you probably wouldn’t know 'em”
then I ask if there’s any hope for me
and he turns and says,

“I don’t know much about will
except that it’s easier to do something else
and what looks good from the view
isn’t always what looks good on yourself”
Track Name: At Owl
plastic clock hung on the wall
tells me it’s time to rock & roll
but all the voices in my head
tell me it’s time to just be quiet

so I am hiding from fluorescents
I'm eating with my eyes closed
fending conversation with I-don’t-knows
and incoherent groaning

bandaid stuck against the tile
makes it near impossible to fake a smile
as the waitress walks by
it mocks my very being
and I am sweating through my t-shirt

can you see me through the ether?
I don’t care
or maybe I take offense
enlightenment is a gateway to condescension
to flipping off your friends

and you say,
“hey, you know, I mean no disrespect
but I’m better now
can you at least understand that?”

and she says,
“get used to playing in the dirt
because no one pays for happy
if they can pay to watch you squirm”

plastic clock hung on the wall
tells me it’s time to rock & roll
but all the voices in my head say,
“you have to think about your future”
Track Name: Flat
we don’t talk when I drive my car
except when we play twenty questions
or argue about something stupid
like wrestling gimmicks
like our parents’ accents
like how I am incapable of taking a compliment
and then I turn on the radio
and it’s a sprite commercial

but how fun would it be to tell a funny story
where something falls out of the sky
or it could be about anything else
you can say anything you’d like

my filter won’t stop filtering
and I will not watch the new star wars
I will go to bed at a reasonable hour
and when the noise comes through my walls
and says I made the wrong decision
I won’t mind if you borrow my speakers
just please don’t make me pay to use your printer

because five cents a page adds up after a while
and I have to print my thesis
so I can scratch it all up and then print it all over
again and again and again and again

I don’t sleep because I have TV
and you are my friend and you entertain me
but sometimes we sit and it gets real quiet
like we aren’t comfortable enough for comfortable silence
I don’t get the reference
you don’t like my jokes
I don’t know if you had any pets growing up
I don’t know why you don’t like your home

you say it’s only weird when I bring it up
and I don’t know
but if you’re right I guess this takes care of that
Track Name: Cardboard Lady
she says straight
I turn left
above my head I can see her dancing,
the cardboard lady with marilyn’s face

she says straight
I turn left
and immediately almost kill a woman
in a light blue civic
but she drives on

and I know you’ll probably be angry at me for most of the day
but I know I probably won’t even remember it anyways
and the kids say, “we’ll keep to keeping faith in the medicine”
I guess until then, we’ll wait
Track Name: Part Two
collapsing water bottles to save space
talking as little as possible to save face
oh, ma, why should I make my bed
just to mess it up later anyways?

when in doubt, I agree
when embarrassed, I forget
when I’m lost, I listen to my gut
and do the opposite of what it says

says he hates himself because
he’s got too many shirts
like, “what kind of psycho narcissist keeps this many shirts?
I don’t even wear half
in fact, I probably only wear four or five”

when we’re together you are the only thing that matters
when we’re apart this seems slightly less attractive
that looks meaner than intended written down
just supposed to be a comment on perspective

but it’s not what I say
it’s more of how I say it
a platitude whose truth I should be more okay with
or I could pull all my teeth out
I could run the other way


I can stay up as late as I want
I can unlock all of the doors
and make friends with the neighbors
I can give all my money to the man in the street
with a cardboard sign that says, “have a nice weekend”
and maybe I’ll find some sleep
or maybe I’m a sucker
and you are right about everything


hearing jokes, hearing fake japanese
trying to justify why I don’t like the beach
and how I can be this bad for you
and you can still be this good to me
something’s burning in the backyard
but out on the lawn we try and act cool
and when we speak it sounds like slogans
and when you look you see that everybody’s
wearing the same hats and jackets
beg for detachment
make the same ten references
over and over
and I just want to be vulnerable again
and you are watching me watching you
are watching me watching you